So, aside from coming right out and saying “I need you. I don’t want to be alone” (which I pretty much did), killing a deer is more important. And it’s only day 4. I have to deal with this until Christmas? Freaking awesome. His last words? “Call your girlfriend. Have her come over.” Um… we’ve been together a year. You don’t know that I DON’T have ANY girlfriends? What is wrong with this picture? I know what’s wrong. I’m just too afraid to admit it out loud or even to myself. I’m not strong enough yet. Maybe someday I will be, but definitely not right now. Note to men… Putting a deer before your girlfriend is just wrong. We have passions too. Do you even know what they are? Probably not, because we put them aside when you come home, to give you our undivided attention. But that’s the whole point. Our time is limited as equally as yours. If we could pursue our passion any time we wanted, we would. But, we have to get things done, we have doctors appointments, we have school meetings, we have karate classes, we have other obligations. Therefore, the things WE’RE most passionate about get put on the back burner. So please don’t pour on the tears feeding us the famous “But it’s only a few months out of the year” crap. It’s bullshit. If you were even remotely invested in your relationships, you’d realize that life is happening all around you, but all you see is a tree stand and pray for that one deer. What you fail to see is there are people who need you. Right here, right now. People who in MY opinion, should come before selfish desires. How would you feel if you asked your girlfriend to stay home; you were feeling lonely and just wanted some one on one time, and her response was “But my mani and pedi coupon is going to expire soon. Call one of your buddies. They’ll come over and cheer you up.” Your urge to go hunting is ruining whatever it is we have left. I hope you realize that. Distance. It’s putting so much distance between us, that you have no idea who I even am. That’s just wrong. I get it. It’s therapeutic. But what are you gaining by sitting in the woods for an hour of daylight, in the rain, where you KNOW you aren’t going to shoot a damn thing? Time. Time away from me. That’s what you’re gaining. Awesome.
And to the one person who I thought could change all of this? Maybe you should have lowered your expectations? It’s nice to see your back as you, too, walk away, ever so slowly, so as not to hurt my feelings. Just fucking go already. I’m done.